Day 3
She's a Killer Queen
Gunpowder, gelatine
Dynamite with a laser beam
Guaranteed to blow your mind
Anytime
Today's my third day of working from here. Technically, I'm fine. The fast internet connection is activated, zoom is ready. Santa didn't realize, that I couldn't work yesterday with the slower connection option while they were watching these Christmas movies the whole day long. I'll push the bill for speed underneath the others and hope, he will pay it without further examination.
Tried to zoom with the Queen of Hearts today. It was terrible, she was so angry, she yelled so loud into the camera microphone, that I was afraid of my eardrum being ruptured. And I have a big eardrum which is not so easy to break. The bigger the ears, the bigger the eardrum and elves have enormous ears.
But that was so so bad, I just heard "Off with your head", again and again, jarring, discordant, unbearable. I turned off the sound and simulated a network problem. Well, working from home can cause network problems, as everyone knows. :-)
(I hope, she will not read this. But I doubt that she's patient enough to read to this section.)
Because of these "network problems", I couldn't work any further. Instead I had to join the other elves and watched Christmas movies. I'm surprised how many different ones there are. At the moment, we are watching "Miracle on 34th Street".
I've been not very productive today. Have to think about a yelling filter for my noise cancelling earphones.
Lesson learned today: keep calm, save your ears and don't call aggressive people from home, you will ruin your whole day. Use email instead
Song of the Day: Killer Queen
Day 4
Hey you know what?
A round cookie with one bite out of it
Looks like a C
A round donut with one bite out of it
Also looks like a C
But it is not as good as a cookie
Oh and the moon sometimes looks like a C
The Queen of Hearts posted her question here in the Atlassian Community, because I didn't call her back yesterday. Well, at least she tried to. She's writing exactly in the same way she's yelling and so the post was caught by the spam bot. Insulting people isn't always the royal road, even if you are a Queen.
But I emailed her and together we found a solution to her problem with the Servicedesk. It took hours, some glasses of eggnog and a lot of cookies to keep calm.
By the way, I miss the fairyland's food courts. Here, we always eat cookies, every single day. Santa's getting so many cookies by the children worldwide on Christmas Eve that there is enough for the whole year, for all of us, Santa, Elves and reindeers. Don't get me wrong, I like cookies, but I would even visit sea witch Ursula in the ocean to get a hearty meal. She's said to create awesome sushi...
With all these cookies every day, I feel so sluggish. Furthermore, I'm not moving. In the fairyland, I used to visit my clients with my bike. There's nothing like a train or a bus there. But that kept me healthy. Now I'm only sitting. And eating. And sleeping. And watching Christmas movies. None of these is burning calories of course. I have to think about some kind of sport program. Maybe I can motivate some other elves to exercise together.
There's an elf currently visiting me in my office with another plate of cookies. I'll ask him. Maybe. But first some cookies. Tomorrow's just another day.
Tip of the day: Exercise like they do in Hamburg on their balconies these days:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMZcoHzCzUw
Song of the Day: Cookie Monster Song
Thomas Schlegel
Administrator
HanseMerkur
Hamburg, Germany
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