πΈπ» SLA Nightmares in Jira Cloud: a Halloween Horror Tale ππ
As Halloween approaches, it's the perfect time to explore the spooky world of Service Level Agreements (SLAs) in Jira Cloud. While we may associate this spooky time with ghouls and ghosts, real-life nightmares can be even worse.
Let us tell you a story that can happen to any of us and some of us are already the main character and don't even realize it...
It happened one cold October evening. A typical support team member was working in a dimly lit office. His name was John Smith π¨π»βπ¦±π». He was getting ready to call it a day and was impatiently adjusting his unruly brown hair and his glasses. The day hadn't been very productive, but he was in a good mood as he reviewed the list of resolved customer requests.
He was about to turn off his computer when his colleague, Sarah, came running to him and almost crying asked him to stay in night shift instead of her. Her child had fallen ill and needed to be taken to the hospital. How could he refuse? Of course, John agreed. He opened the laptop and continued to work.
As the office fell into an eerie silence and the outside world plunged into darkness John, who was now alone in the office, decided to make a cup of coffee. A few minutes later, he listened to the machine hissing in the corner of the office kitchenette, deep in thought. What our hero was thinking about will remain a secret, but certainly not about how dramatically and horribly this evening would change in just a few minutes.
While John was about to take his first sip of coffee, the office lights flashed on and off. Fear crept into John's heart, but he didn't dare call the electricians in the dead of night. Turning on the flashlight on his phone, he tried to find the problem but saw a silhouette flying from corner to corner and froze in fright. Looking closely, he didn't see anything, but he suddenly began to hear the sound of a clockwork hand and then another and more. It seemed that someone had put many clocks in his head and started an accelerated countdown. In the next moment some queries popped up in his memory that he had forgotten entirely about but needed to be solved 4-6 or 10 hours ago. John quickly ran to his laptop and didn't notice how dozens of eyes, amazingly similar to clocks, shone out of the shadows. These were the eyes of one of the worst horrors of the SLA β the Phantom Deadline π»β° .
Filled with tension, John checked all the tickets three times through different issue filters, but found none of them outstanding. With a slight doubt, he let out a sigh of relief. Remembered his unfinished coffee, which he left in the kitchen, our hero got up from the table and managed to walk only a few steps before another encounter with even more horror. Before his eyes appeared something familiar, but so old that it looks like a moving corpse. Trying to rememberwhat is it, John realized that he hadn't checked all the tasks, and he returned to his laptop and started looking for them in his old projects. He opens one of them, and instead of a list of tasks, he sees only a loading icon... a minute... a third... try to reload, and again only an icon. That way, our hero met two of the most ancient monsters at once: ποΈπ Zombie Project and Data Overload π§π»β³.
After a while, John decided to get around the problem by watching everything in the SLA reports, but unfortunately, he fell into a next trap. The Frankenstein's Reports π§ποΈ were already waiting for him. Poor John couldn't find the indicators he was looking for, no matter how much he searched. It seemed that each report had the right name only because it didn't show any of the information he needed. Hour after agonizing hour, John battled these relentless monsters until his laptop was with almost empty battery.
Almost desperate, our hero is about to call the electricians to fix the problem when suddenly the light comes back on. But for some reason, this no longer pleases our resilient support person. He puts his laptop on the charger with difficulty and goes to the kitchen to make the owl a new cup of coffee. Every step is extremely difficult. His eyes don't want to focus. John finally makes it to the kitchen, but instead of making coffee, he starts staring out the small window. He doesn't want anything. He does not see any sense in anything. He doesn't see that the window no longer reflects his face but a gray, hard, and dry human body. John himself has become a monster, the most terrible of all β The π πΏ Werewolf Burnout. A second later, everything disappears.
A loud bell brings John to his senses. He woke up in his bed at home in a cold sweat. His heart was pounding, and the nightmare seemed all too real. So he urgently logs on to his smartphone and searches for his issues in Jira app. To ensure everything is okay, he opens his laptop and looks into the β¨ SLA Time and Report add-on π. All seems ok. John smiles at his flashbacks and calmly looks through the list of green SLA metrics. Nothing was missed or broken. He looked at the calendar and realized that he had dreamt about today and that he didn't know any Sarah at all. It was all just an obsessive Halloween dream.
"That's right,"β he thought, β"it's Halloween, I'll have to get ready!"
Then John logged back into the SLA app and checked all the SLA settings for the caliper team in one window: Start-Pause-Stop conditions and SLA goals, and he decided to add one custom notification. Satisfied with the result, he worked a good day without any problems and went home. He was already prepared to Halloween.10 AM, Eric, John's coworker, a little sleepy, decided to make himself a coffee. Suddenly, he received a notification from the app. He looked at it, smiled and took a sip of coffee.
The end.
As you celebrate Halloween, remember that Jira Cloud SLA horror stories can be all too real. So you should be ready to meet them. One way to prevent all nightmares is to take such helpful tools as SLA time and Report for Jira add-on. With this app, all SLA problems will pass you by.
ππ―οΈβ Happy Halloween, dear Community!
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